Beatrix's Trial

Morris Skully Ace Attorney: *scowls at Beatrix O'Reilly*
Fred: *scowls at Morris Skully*
Judge Bennett OBE: Beatrix O'Reilly, as I'm sure you're aware, this is your appeal. Your last chance. The crimes you stand accused of are despicable, but everyone deserves a fair trial.
Beatrix: *scowls at crotch*
Judge Bennett OBE: Let's just hope your lawyer is crap.
Beatrix: Objection!
Judge Bennett OBE: Overruled.
Beatrix: *scowls some more*
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: *looks optimistic*
Beatrix: *ejaculates on optimism*
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: "may we begin, your honour?"
Judge Bennett OBE: Proceed at your leisure, Sir Skully.
Beatrix: *grins like a psychopath*
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: *tastes Beatrix's cum of defeat*
Beatrix: Objection!
Judge Bennett OBE: What is it now?
Beatrix: It was not cum of defeat, your honour.
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: tasted like it
Judge Bennett OBE: Order!
Fred: *scowls at O'Reilly*
Fred: Let me make the objections!
Judge Bennett OBE: If you will not act like adults, I will force you to take a nap.
Judge Bennett OBE: Skully, whenever you're ready.
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: it's not nap time
Judge Bennett OBE: Exactly, Skully.
Beatrix: *mumbles something about children*
Judge Bennett OBE: Just get on with it will you.
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: I'm not sleepy
Fred: Just stay quiet, nonse.
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: SILENCE
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: yes thank you your honour
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: we stand here today to decide the fate of one Beatrix O'Reilly
Judge Bennett OBE has changed his/her name to "Judge Bennett Q-bloody-C."
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: your honour I'd like to call Ms O'Reilly to the stand
Fred: OBJECTION.
Judge Bennett: Yes, Winston?
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: Winston your honour?
Fred: I believe that it holds court in contempt to declare decision of fate so early in a trial
Fred: The accused stands here innocent until proven guilty
Judge Bennett: The defence, Skully, do pay attention.
Morris Skully Ace Attorney: maam I am the prosecution
Beatrix: D:
Morris Skully Ace Attourney has changed his/her name to "Morris Skully Ace Prosecution"
Judge Bennett: Very well, Winston. Skully, rephrase your opening statement.
Beatrix: LOOK, I'M INNOCENT, I AM
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: very well your honour
Judge Bennett: GRAHAM BE QUIET.
Beatrix: EHEHEHEEEEE
Judge Bennett: I will hold you in contempt of court if you don't shut up.
Fred: *whispers to accused, did you remember to burn the photos of you.... and the choir boys?*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: we are here today to establish whether or not the accused one Beatrix O'Reilly is guilty or innocent of the crimes she is accused of
Beatrix: *"Yes...No. Wait. Oh shi-"
Fred: *Oh....*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: may I call the accused to the stand your honour?
Judge Bennett: Go ahead, Jones.
Fred: Objection.
Beatrix: *What now?
Judge Bennett: What could you possibly object to in that, Winston?
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: I have here exhibit a
Beatrix: *What are you doing, Winston?!
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: I shall pass it to each one of you in turn
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: can you please tell me what this is, Beatrix?
Beatrix: I...uh
Beatrix: *ahem*
Fred: I would like defer the cross examination of said accused until the proceedings of other witnesses
Beatrix: Well
Beatrix: Yes
Judge Bennett: Overruled. Prosecution may continue.
Fred: *coughs and glares heavily*
Beatrix: LALALAAAA
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: just a moment your honour
Fred: *whispers, good, make them think you've gone insane.*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: I need to clean my teeth
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: brb
Beatrix: *Isn't that just what Radishbottom did?!*
Judge Bennett: ...
Judge Bennett: Call for break.
Judge Bennett: All rise.
Judge Bennett: *leaves*
Beatrix: *rises and sings Blue*
Fred: *For goodness sake, sit down*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ok im ready
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: thankyou your honour
Beatrix: *sits down again*
Judge Bennett: All rise for the Honourable Judge Bennett (QC)
Judge Bennett: Thank you.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *risez*
Beatrix: *rises...again*
Fred: *Rises in lethargy*
Judge Bennett: *sits*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ok
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *sits*
Beatrix: *sits*
Judge Bennett: Can we try and get this over by lunch please.
Beatrix: Yes please
Judge Bennett: Prosecution, where were we.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: yes maam
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ok
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: here i have exhibit A
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: i shall pass it to each of you in turn
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: Beatrix
Beatrix: Yessir?
Fred: *does cut throat sign*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: can you describe the evidence to the court
Beatrix: *takes exhibit*
Fred: *mimes deny everything*
Beatrix: It's um...
Judge Bennett: Hmm.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: Beatrix
Beatrix: It's a kebab.
Beatrix: *nods head fervently*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...
Judge Bennett: O'Reilly, your mental records came back as perfectly normal.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *wiggles ass with delight*
Beatrix: D:
Judge Bennett: Please answer the questions sensibly.
Beatrix: I SEE A KEBAB, YOUR HONOUR
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: as the court can clearly see
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: this is a polaroid of sweet little Timmy
Fred: *stands up*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: he never meant to hurt nobody
Fred: Objection.
Beatrix: I see a kebab.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: he was always a good little boy
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: BUT THEN ONE DAY
Fred: OBJECTIOIN.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *glares at Beatrix*
Fred: OBJECTULATION!
Beatrix: *glares right back*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: the prosecution rests your honour
Beatrix: OJECTULATION
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *points finger at Beatrix*
Beatrix: *nibbles finger*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *sits down*
Beatrix: *sits on*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *continues pointing*
Beatrix: *continues nibbling*
Beatrix: Wait S:
Judge Bennett: Winston, you may start your defence.
Beatrix: D:
Beatrix: Why does your finger taste like poo?
Beatrix: *vomits on face*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: because
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: im an attourney
Beatrix: *vomits on attourney*
Fred: First of all.
Fred: *holds up item A*
Judge Bennett: O'Reilly, Skully, SHUT UP.
Beatrix: *vomits on item A, O'Reilly, Skully and shut up*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: OBJECTION
Judge Bennett: *bangs gavel*
Beatrix: *vomits on gavel*
Fred: This IS a kebab.
Beatrix: *vomits on kebab*
Beatrix: I don't know what's going on anymore
Judge Bennett: Barklings, the jury can clearly see it is not a kebab.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *mouths boobs 4 you at judge Bennett*
Judge Bennett: And as far as I know, the defence attorney can't plead insane.
Beatrix: Why not??
Judge Bennett: Skully, behave.
Judge Bennett: I'm not sure, O'Reilly.
Judge Bennett: Just one of those things.
Fred: Your honour
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...
Fred: I demand silence in the court
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: objection
Beatrix: *vomits on objection*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: you have no right to make demands
Fred: I DEMAND JUSTICE.
Beatrix: *vomits on demands and justice*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: your honour id like to make a request
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: may i have the floor for a moment?
Judge Bennett: Skully, you were rested, as I recall.
Fred: Your honour
Fred: The floor is mine
Judge Bennett: Barklings, silence will be maintained for as long as I can keep it.
Judge Bennett: Continue.
Fred: I have not yet constructed a defence.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: i know your honour but in light of new evedence we'd like to re open our case
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: just for a few moments
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: pleeese your honour
Her Honour Judge: Please wait for the defence to finish.
Fred: *Sweats*
Judge Bennett: Barklings, would you like a few moments to prepare yourself?
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: fine
Fred: The weight of the evidence put before you, your honour and our good jury
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: but i warn you maam he's not a spooner
Fred: Is inconclusive at best
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: he wont holdyou till the morning comes
Fred: Tittar tatter at worst
Fred: Now I'd like to cross examine the accused
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: as soon as he's finished hes outta there
Judge Bennett: Jones, personal life is not relevant here. Now shut up or no happy ending.
Judge Bennett: Go ahead, Barklings.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: yes maam
Fred: Miss Graham, would it be fair to say that you are a person of weak stomach and mind:?
Beatrix: Yessir.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...*erection*
Beatrix: Very much so.
Beatrix: D:
Fred: I put it to you jury
Fred: That the accused standing before you could not possibly have commited the acts of which she is confused
Fred: Nay
Fred: And inspite of whatever psychological examinations she has been put through
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: £20 Barklings is a fag
Fred: I put it to you that she is not emotionally stable
Beatrix: I'll go for that.
Beatrix: I mean
Fred: I put it to you that if she goes to prison, she'll just be another suicide case.
Beatrix: TRUTH
Fred: Or perhaps the jury feels that, that is simply paper work.
Fred: But I plead, emote, I put before you my large earnings when I say.
Fred: She is a human being
Fred: Nonse or not.
Fred: Thank you, your honour.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: ...
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: may i have the floor?
Judge Bennett: Briefly, Skully.
Judge Bennett: This had better be good.
Fred: Objection
Judge Bennett: Overruled.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: it will be your honour
Judge Bennett: Hurry it up then.
Judge Bennett: Lunch approaches.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: id like to present a very different kind of evidence to the court this morning
Fred: OBMOTHERFUCKINGYOURCHILDRENINTHEBUSHESJECTION.
Judge Bennett: Barklings, please leave the court and come back when you have composed yourself!
Fred: *greases back hair* Sorry your honour, I shall be seated.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: shall we wait your honour?
Judge Bennett: He is fine now, Skully. Continue.
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: id like to present my next peice of evedence with a little peice of dance
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *takes center stage*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *lights dim*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OPM3ex1jrk&feature=related
Judge Bennett: And what exactly, Skully, is this supposed to prove?
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: (AND THE COURT GOES WIILLLLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *w000t*
Fred: Your honour, I'd like to have this discounted as exhibitionism with no relevance. *greases back grease*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: well then im outta here hommiez
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *put jet pack on*
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: see yo later chikaz
Judge Bennett: Jury, go get a verdict.
Fred: See yo lata biiiiatttch!
Morris Skully Ace Prosecution: *PCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*